4GY-arr -- WE RISE!

Friday, September 01, 2006
12:33 AM

Hello everyone, i realised i have never blogged here before (: or rather haven't blogged since i was sec one. hahah. hey, at least i am not a virgin at blogging(what were you thinking!?)

Firstly, i just wanna say that i miss everyone from 4GY. It feels as if i haven't gone to school for a really long time. and i totally wanna kick myself for falling sick on teacher's day. i bet all of you had so much fun in the "ah-beng/lian" get up. this is so unfair! i was like stressing myself the day before on what to wear OKAY. and i didn't pon on purpose.

Secondly, Joakim is finally out of Singapore idol. Strangely, i feel kinda sad cause i was secretly hoping Jasmine would get kicked out. Ah, yes. (oh well, quoting a bio teacher "Joke-akim" is out.)

Okay, i have something to confess. i really really miss the class, which is extremely strange. I hate to tell myself that I am actually growing attached to the school. I mean it's a great school but i did not feel the need to feel attached to the school (as in, i wasn't like in this school since i was primary one or sec one) okay, whatever, I am talking rubbish. Anyway, i wanna thank everyone who sms-ed me well wishes and stuff. It was really sweet of you guys! okay, comparing this post to the other posts, this is like some major RANTING GIBBERISH post. This makes me feel obligated to pluck a quote from somewhere and put it in.

I am very overwhelmed by the pressure of prelims and i am so darn sure i am gonna funk(when you try to say the f-word and flunk at the same time) prelims and o's seems really gloomy and grey. But to everyone out there studying/mugging for prelims and o's, i wish you guys all the best. somehow i can see most of the people from our class ending up in top JCs and holding high ranks/status in big big BIG companies after graduating from universities. and i on the other hand, can see myself, wearing an NYDC shirt taking people's orders. (oh, maybe in the years to come, an A'level cert is required to wait on tables)

so everyone, don't be afraid of greatness if you don't believe you can do it. because some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon them.
and to those who are trying to lose weight or due to the lack of time, should stop and eat okay! always remember, you should always always live to eat and not eat to live.

and i would like to dedicate this post to all teachers out there, especially those who are really really awesome like our A-math and Biology teacher. Thank you Mrs Tan, for tolerating all my nonsense and teaching me A-math all over again and did not at any moment scolded/blamed/lamented that i should have paid attention in class and you did not deserve to waste your time teaching me all over, (although, i wished you would scold me, give me like a really bad tongue lashing, maybe i would feel better and less guilty when i go into sleep mode during your class). Thank you Mr Joe for coming and relieving me of Mrs Highlighter (i personally have a gut feeling that she likes yellow pilot highlighters) and for making Bio lessons more tolerable especially when it is a last period. Thank you for all the little things that you do (you should know what you do, so i shan't elaborate further :DD ). oh yes, and thank you laoshi for calling my parents and telling them that i didn't finish so much homework but told them i paid attention in class? okay, well, i showed you huh, before you called i said i would do well in the next test okay! and you didn't wait for the next test. well, just so you know(or rather, you would never know since you don't read this blog/or can decipher this) my parents killed me. but i am thankful you did that, it felt as though your "bo-chapness" towards the class actually has another side huh. and thank you to all the other teachers. ah, and our damn damn super tolerant of us, and the really funny/humourous form teacher, Mrs Logan. hope you're recovering well from your loss. don't worry, we've got your back.

i think i am insane. up at this hour, not studying but, blogging a senseless post. i just spent a damn damn long time staring at a candle burn, and i am attempting to add wax to it cause it's gonna burn out (don't ask me how) okay, forgive me, this is the first post i have done in 3 years. and it's not even insightful at all. okay, i shall attempt a more insightul piece that is perhaps worth reading, but then again, what exactly is worth reading? the mundane lives that people blog about, or people who sound insightful and some who try to sound insightful(eg, majella)

there will be a time when we lose faith in ourselves, lose hope in the people around us, when something seems to be pulling us into a deep black hole. there will be a time when our candle that signifies our lives starts to burn out and no one seems to be there to replenish the wax. when we lose all purpose in living and when the day comes when you start asking yourself when you wake up every morning, why am i still living? what is god's purpose for me? can't He just liberate me and take me home, back into his arms?

when the negativity, pessimism, hate, and jealousy engulfs us, we start to pray. for a better tomorrow, a brighter future than the darkness and gloom that seems to be enveloping us. there will be a time, when our sole existence on earth seems threatened to be wiped out. our insignificant existance wants desperately to be invisible, but somewhere inside of you is screaming to be somebody to create history, be someone different, to have dreams of being a rock star, a celebrity.

We hope for the day when we stop punching ourselves in the face, bringing pain so we feel alive again, driving ourselves into damnation so when someone comes along to ask us if we are alright we feel that someone cares, when we no longer feel ourselves burn out like the candles, dripping slowly to nothing, dripping down our lives, dripping slowly, slowly dripping.

till it stops burning, we hold out to our dear lives and try to rid ourselves of the mundane routine that we are accustomed to. till it stops burning, as we wait our turn to be accepted into the kingdom of God, we wait patiently, and try to make our existence more worthwhile. we try to smile more, bring joy to other people's life when actually inside you are all cut up and bleeding profusely. till it stops burning, we delude ourselves that perhaps it is worth living after all seeing all happy faces on the people you bring joy to. till it stops burning, you think you will be accepted into the Kingdom of God by doing charity and community service. till it stops burning, you seem to only find joy in helping other people, leaving your studies and work to rot and burn. till it stops burning, you feel Lucifer staring at you and smiling when he sees you commit sins.

till it stops burning, we hope for better tomorrow, a brighter future. a cure to our negativity, a bandage for your insides that is all cut up, a remedy that would take all pain away. till it stops burning, we have our whole lives ahead of us that we must lead. till it stops burning, we have to thread carefully. till it stops burning, we cannot stop loving because this is the one and only way of keeping ourselves alive.

oh god, i sound so retarded. okay, it is 1.45 in the morning. my bad. delete this if you want. but "i'll be back" with more rubbish to torture my beloved classmates ((: i love 4GY.
see you guys in school.
by the way, who's going for the full lit class on Monday? i have kinda 'sold' my life to church this weekend so i'll be really bummed out and tired on Monday. those who are going and might be sitting near me, be prepared to cough or shake me violently to wake me up. jolt me from my dreams cause my dreams have been really weird lately, but i will spare you from that.

with love, Majella :DD someone should be next to me the next time i blog, then i can be reminded not to sound so retarded and sappy.

happy teacher's day! and to Miss Soh as well, we miss you loads! (if you happen to chance upon this page)

Bid me crew avast! Keep yer banner high
Classed, forever a class :)
Class of our own
Wind be at yer backs, sails never slackin'